


Episode Three - Lyrica is not for Everyone (A pain in my Ass)

by GeeGollyWiz13



Series: Out Tonight [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Additional Tags by Request, Allison and Lydia are roommates, Along with Erica Isaac and Boyd, Alternate Universe- Apartment Building, Derek is their Grumpy Neighbor, F/F, F/M, M/M, OOC (For you Sticklers out There), Scott and Stiles are Roomies, Sitcom AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 04:34:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2534363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeeGollyWiz13/pseuds/GeeGollyWiz13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek invites himself over some baseball and pizza. Stiles and Derek come up with a plan to help two of their friends see reason (and to stop torturing them).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Episode Three - Lyrica is not for Everyone (A pain in my Ass)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SpookyBibi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpookyBibi/gifts), [Kawaiicoyote](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kawaiicoyote/gifts).



> I AM BACK- yes. Hahah- right? Okay, so this is for all you lovelies. But especially to Spookybibi and my amazing Alpha Heidi (aka Kawaiicoyote). Heidi helped me come up with the name and such, so I'm very happy to say this is partly her brain child <3

Stiles had just got done paying the pizza delivery boy for his cheesy and delicious food of the gods when there was a knock at the door. Groaning, Stiles turned back to the door, pizza box still in hand. If it was the delivery guy, Stiles was going to have a serious talk with him about learning to accept the tip that Stiles could afford to give him.

                “Did you for- oh, hey Derek.” Stiles said, opening up the door to reveal Derek, his grumpy neighbor, and resident Yankees fan.

                “Stiles. You watching the game?” Derek asked, smiling.

                Ever since the eventful game where Stiles and Scott had the whole “gang” as they now called themselves over to their apartment to watch a baseball game, they’d become slow friends. The game had ended up in heated arguments, and one very tipsy Derek, who blushed his way out the door, celebrating his win much more quietly than he had been.

                “Duh! Just ordered a pizza for the occasion. Did you want to come in?” Stiles opened the door wider, and noticed then that Derek was carrying a six pack of root beer.

                “Came prepared I see.” Stiles teased, and Derek blushed, huffing.

                “I thought it would be rude if I invited myself over with nothing to drink. Root beer okay? I just don’t want to risk anything alcoholic.” Derek said, placing the pack on the worn countertop.

                “Naw, it’s okay. I’m alone tonight anyway. Scott and Allison are on some pseudo-not date. It’s like they keep dancing around each other. So it’s just me and my team. And well, you now. I hope plain cheese is okay!” Stiles said, grabbing a few plates out of the cabinet and grabbing a slice.

                “It sounds great.” Derek replied, following suit. Both of the men sat down on the couch with a sigh.

                “So, how have you been?” Derek asked, in between bites of pizza and Stiles on the edge of his seat.

                “I’ve been okay. Work has been kind of insane, but it’s work. What else can you do? Software goes down, it goes up, there are bugs, kinks, and everything else. Right now I’m working in the Software help department. I get all the calls of ‘Hey, I can’t log into my email’ or ‘Hey, how do I remove this virus because my internet history is super sketchy’ kind of stuff. But I have a few ideas for some apps and games that I think could really set the company apartment.” Stiles explained, taking a few long drags of his root beer.

                “That sounds amazing. Fun, even.” Derek smiled shyly, and took a sip of his own bottle.

                “What about you? How’s accounting?” Stiles asked, and Derek frowned.

                “Fine.”

                “Is that all?” Stiles asked, and Derek nodded.

                “Oh.”

                Stiles looked back to the TV, suddenly wondering why Derek had gotten so defensive and sour mouthed. Maybe it was talking about what Derek did. Maybe Derek didn’t like what he did.

                “I…I’m sorry. I… I don’t like talking about work. My sisters try to do that enough when I’m off the clock.” Derek explained, the ghost of the frown still around his mouth.  “And then they talk to me about private things at work. They don’t know the difference. They ask about books and numbers when I’m trying to eat, or they call when I’m at my weekly massage. But they ask about my love life or my friends when I am trying to balance books of people who make a lot of money. Enough money to make me disappear if I happen to mess up. And I don’t mean that I’m caught up in Gangsters, but I mean like Paris Hilton would make it so that no one knew who I ever was if I lost their money. It’s so annoying.” Derek explained.

                Stiles was still getting used to Derek, even after forming their tentative friendship. When they’d first met, he was unsociable, shy, quiet. And he still was. Stiles could remember their meeting so well, and then a while later, how stiff he’d been when Stiles asked him to their baseball party. But it was all because Derek was incredibly shy. He kept things in. Erica had come by the next day after the infamous salsa throwing incident to apologize, and to explain how badly Derek had been hurt by people in the past. There was Paige, whom Peter had talked about. But there were two others.  Used for love, his body, and his money. Apparently there had been more than one young lady who thought it would be okay to use him in their favor.

                “Well, let’s just hope Taylor Swift doesn’t  ask you to manage her money. We don’t need a song about lost money, let alone a song about lost love. Instead of no one knowing your name, everyone will. It’ll be like reverse isolation.” Stiles joked, and Derek rolled his eyes, ghost of frown gone. It had been replaced with a smile.

                “Yeah. I can only see it now.” Derek smiled.

                “But, now that I know I can ask about friends, how are they? Boyd doing okay? Isaac? Erica?” Stiles asked, and put his empty plate on coffee table.

                “Boyd is doing well. Isaac is of course as sassy as ever. He just got a new job at some accessories place a few blocks away. Erica is… well she’s been weird lately. She’s asked me to watch romantic comedies with her twice this week, and has been consuming a lot of chocolate for it not being her time of the month. Which I keep track of by the way. It sounds strange, but so worth it when I gain favor by bringing cupcakes and painkillers.” Derek shakes his head.

                “What do you think is going on?” Stiles leaned in a little bit.

                “I don’t know. I’ve never seen her like this. It’s weird.”

                “Well, I hope she’s okay. I like her, she’s cool.” Stiles smiled, and Derek responded with one of his own.

                “How are your friends? I know you said Scott and Allison have been somewhat romantically entangled. What about Lydia?” Derek asked, and Stiles groaned.

                “Ugh, she’s been insane. She comes over all the time now, and puts her wine in our fridge. Not that I mind, I love her to death already, but she’s been so mopey. On and on about how girls like her are a rarity and should be cherished. That some people would be honored to have her. That she’s… she’s not scared? I don’t know. When she goes on and on, my mind fuzzes out a little like it used to in class. Like, I want to listen, I just can’t. I think she’s got a crush on some guy at work.” Stiles shrugs. He takes another sip of his bottle before he notices the look on Derek’s face.

                “Hey, you don’t think…” Derek asks, and Stiles immediately gets an idea in his head.

                “No way. I knew she liked Erica, but do you think…”

                “Erica hasn’t said anything about being rejected- trust me, I would know. She goes wild when someone rejects her. Like breaks all the plates in MY apartment when she is.” Derek frowns. “They must be pining for each other.”

                “I told Lydia she needed to do something about it! Ugh, when I said that I did not mean she needed to lay on my couch and get wine drunk and spill her problems.” Stiles frowned.

                “Do you…do you think we should do something?”  Derek fiddles a bit with the neck of the bottle.

                “Like what? Push them into a closet?” Stiles retorts, snorting.

                “We could get them to dinner together. Tell them to meet us there and never actually show up. Prepay for the table, so they can still eat or something. It would be perfect. They would get mad, I’m sure. But they would thank us.” Derek explained, and Stiles thought it was crazy enough it just might work.

                “Alright, so plan Lyrica is now in effect. How about this Friday? You get Erica all dolled up and have her meet ‘you’ at the super fancy café down on 5th for dinner. I’ll have Lydia do the same thing. They’ll wine, they’ll dine, and they’ll have a good time. We can totally pull this off.” Stiles smiled, and Derek held out his bottle of root beer. They shared a celebratory toast.

                “This is going to work out perfectly!”

 

______________________________________________________________

                This was no going to work out at all like they had hoped.

                “I don’t understand why we can’t just go together, Stiles. It’s not like we don’t live in the same building.” Lydia said on Friday over the phone.

                “I told you. I have tons of work to do, they sent it home with me. I already made the reservations. You need to keep the spot for us!” Stiles whimpered, making his way into his room. He’d just gotten home from work, and so far, this wasn’t going as planned.

                “I mean, I don’t even know why we’re going here in the first place. If this is your idea of having me pay for dinner, Stiles, I swear…” Lydia began.

                “I want to make you feel good, okay?!” Stiles huffed. “Maybe, maybe I know you’ve been laying on the couch all the time watching stupid love movies and coming over here to drink all your wine in my fridge. It needs to stop, so I am taking you out.”

                Lydia got quiet over the phone, and Stiles wondered for a moment if he had broken her. Maybe he’d gone too far.

                “Well…thank you. Stiles, I really appreciate that. And I know we haven’t been friends long, but I totally feel as though I’ve known your nerdy ass much longer than a few weeks.” Lydia said softly, and Stiles could sense her smile over the phone.

                “Good. Now you get your ass dolled up, and we’ll have a great night, okay?” Stiles said, kicking off his shoes.

                “Okay. See you later, Stiles!”

                Stiles fell onto his bed, face in his pillow when his phone chimed.

                From: Derek and the Yankees Suck

                                Are we bad people?

                To: Derek and the Yankees Suck

                                Why would you say that?

                From: Derek and the Yankees Suck

                                Because Erica is happier than I’ve

                                seen her in months… she’s singing in the

                                shower.

                To: Derek and the Yankees Suck

                                We are such bad people….

 

                Stiles frowned at his phone, and groaned into his pillow. It was only a matter of time before Lydia left, and then figured out that Stiles wouldn’t be showing. And by that time, Erica will have showed up, and the whole thing would blow up in Stiles’ and Derek’s faces. Why did they think this was ever going to work? Perhaps it was the rare bonding between them, or the fact that Stiles thought that Derek really sounded like he cared about Erica, and wanted to see her happy himself. It was a big, messy, and complicated feelings-fest.

                This was not going to work out at all like they planned.

 

 ______________________________________________________________

                “This is exactly what they had planned, didn’t they?” Erica asked, crossing her arms as she took in the sight of Lydia, looking dejected over a glass of water.

                “Erica?” Lydia asked, and the red headed woman could feel her heart starting to race. While Lydia had chosen something simple, yet fashionable, a 50’s style dress with three quarter sleeves in purple, Erica had gone with a leather skirt, sequined tank top, and a small leather shrug. She looked half classy, half wild. And every bit of Lydia’s bad girl wet dreams.

                “This is perfect.” Erica growled, and pulled out her phone.

                “What are you doing here? Did Stiles send you? He was supposed to meet me here. Is something wrong, did something happen?”

                “Something totally happened. And they are so going to get it. Derek is going to die tonight, he can kiss getting that new client deal goodbye.” Erica sat, tapping at her phone.

                “Is everything okay, Erica? You didn’t answer me!” Lydia asked, exasperated.

                “Yeah. So, you didn’t know?” Erica asked, sitting down across from Lydia.

                “About what?”

                “That they were going to shove us together to go on a date? Ugh, this is so unlike Derek, but totally like Stiles. I could totally see him planning this. No wonder Derek seemed so excited for dinner this Friday. He’s never that excited for anything except a Yankees game.” Erica huffed, grabbing the bottle of wine that had been chilling next to the table. She poured herself a healthy glass, and poured one for Lydia as well.

                “D-Date? I think you’re mistaken.” Lydia tried to defend. She was upset at Stiles, not only for ditching her, but for concocting this crazy plan, and telling Derek about her crush on Erica.

                “No. I’m not. Because I’ve had a fucking thing for you since you moved in with Allison. I’ve been too chicken shit to say anything. I… I like you, as both a friend and as a woman. I don’t know if you’re into chicks, but I mean, if you are I want to try this.” Erica explained, and drank a healthy portion of her healthy glass of wine.

                “What?” Lydia could hardly believe what she was hearing. There was no way. Erica was… well Erica. Hot, sassy, and perfectly able to keep up with the guys. She could talk fashion and catch a football… at the same time. She was an enigma to Lydia, and Lydia wanted to spend all her time finding her out and opening her up in…. many ways.

                “You heard me, carrot-top.” Erica sighed.

                “Uhm… I, I do have a crush on you as well. I mean, I never said anything because I didn’t want to ruin the friendship. I like talking to you. You’re unlike any friend I’ve ever had- Allison is my best friend, but I can talk to you about fashion and stuff. Allison is boho chic, but doesn’t know Prada from Gucci, and you do. And you know things I don’t- it challenges me.” Lydia confessed, and took a sip of her own wine.

                “And you’re not afraid of your appearance, how it might look dating a girl?” Erica asked, playing with the stem of the wine glass.

                “Not at all! I am a progressive woman!” Lydia exclaimed, and watched as Erica smiled wide, getting butterflies in her stomach.

                “Okay. Then it’s settled. We’re on a date. We like each other. We’re both scared as hell. But I also think it’s a night of rejoicing.” Erica smiled, and Lydia smiled back, raising her glass up for Erica to toast.

                “And for what?”

                “Stiles and Derek are going to totally get more than they bargained for.” Erica smiled.

 

 

 _____________________________________________________________

                It was about midnight when Derek knocked on Stiles’ and Scott’s door. He was nervous, worried, and panicking. Erica had texted him a few hours ago just a “seriously???” and he hadn’t heard from her since. He knew that she’d made it okay, watching from a block away as she walked into the restaurant, and then running home.

                What if Lydia didn’t go, and Derek really left Erica sitting there by herself? What if Erica walked out on Lydia, and had gone somewhere else and wasn’t safe? A million thoughts rose up in his head between the time he knocked at the time that Stiles opened the door, groggy.

                “Derek?”

                “Have you heard from Lydia or Erica? I’m worried.” Derek said, walking into the apartment, pushing through the small space that Stiles had left between the door frame and his own body.

                “No. Have you? Is everything okay?” Stiles asked, a little more awake.

                “No! Which is exactly why I’m freaking out! What if something happened, what if they’re in trouble?” Derek ran his hands through his hair. It was also at that moment that Derek noticed Stiles was still in his clothes, rumpled layers of dress coat and t-shirt, khaki pants and dress socks.

                “Calm down there, Lassie. I’m sure everything is okay.” Stiles yawned, and checked his watch. “They’re probably laughing it up and getting drunk on our money. Let’s just hope something comes out of it. If they don’t say anything tomorrow, then it’s time to panic.” Stiles said, walking over to Derek to usher him out of the apartment.

                “But…”

                “Derek. They will be okay. Trust me. You worry too much.” Stiles sighed, and tried to ignore the fact that he had his hand wrapped about Derek’s very strong, very warm bicep. He was too exhausted to think of these things properly.

                “T-Thanks…. Stiles, for being there.” Derek smiled, and tried to will his nerves away. Just as he was about to open his apartment door, Stiles waiting for him to get in before he closed his own, he heard a banging on the steps coming from upstairs. He instantly froze, his hand still on the doorknob.

                Isaac, delirious and furious looking, was flying down the steps to Derek’s door. Boyd was following him closely, although seeming more to be trying to reign him in than help him out.

                “You two!” Isaac hissed, getting right into Derek’s face, and then looking over at Stiles. “Do you even know what you’ve done!?” Isaac fumed, and Stiles’ jaw dropped.

                Once again, all Derek could think about was Erica up on the couch, crying her eyes out upset, and his heart sank. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he knew that she would have ever agreed to ask her out, and from what Stiles said, Lydia wouldn’t have taken the chance either.

                “What have we done?” Stiles asked, looking at Derek worriedly.

                “Erica is up there…. It’s unmentionable!” Isaac shouted, and Derek lowered his head.

                “Isaac, Boyd. I am sorry, I didn’t know it would end up like this!” Stiles exclaimed exactly what Derek had been thinking.

                “Really?! You think getting them together would have been a good idea? Now it’s going to ruin my life!”

                “Isaac, it’s not that bad.” Boyd stated, and Isaac turned to him.

                “You don’t share a wall with her! All I hear is her!”

                “Isaac, please, is she crying a lot?” Derek asked, and then Isaac looked confused.

                “Crying? Crying OUT maybe! Erica and Lydia have been up there having sex for the past three hours! I share a wall, a WALL! I hear everything! I am not adverse to Erica getting it on with whomever her heart contents, but Lydia? Lydia can SCREAM, let me tell you. You want to know how I know?! I’ve heard it! It’s horrifying! And the only way I knew it was you two numbskulls was because the whiteboard on her door reads: Ask Derek and Stiles in Erica’s drunk scrawl!” Isaac cried out, and Stiles let his head loll back.

                “You’re…. you’re not here because they’re upset. You’re here because they’re fucking each other’s brains out. Oh my god!” Stiles asked, and Derek could suddenly cry with relieve.

                “You two are in deep shit. Let me tell you. I am never going to sleep until I get even.” Isaac said, and walked back up the stairs with Boyd, who had been shaking his head at the whole ordeal.

                “They… they actually were okay.” Derek sighed, smiling in relief.

                “Dude- it totally worked out!” Stiles cheered, and waved Derek good night.

                It had totally worked out. Just like they (totally) knew it would.


End file.
